Hello, it's me again! The retired kancolle admiral going by the name of Rosewood (Gave my account to a friend). It's been a long time since I last popped up here but here's a few buncha words. I'm trying out 3rd person writing again to try and see which one is more appealing / which way I write better or worse. Feel free to tear it up or point out bullshit.


Scene 1
[+] Spoiler


"Amane! When do you plan on waking up?" said a woman carrying a pile of stinky rags you can barely call clothes as she stepped inside a dingy, small, tatami-floored room.

She was in her early thirties, statuesque, with a well-toned body. Her silky, waist-length, white hair still amazingly beautiful even with all the tedium she has to deal with daily.

"You're late! Hurry up and get your breakfast!"

Her voice boomed. An assortment of cats, all scattered across the room, stood from their coiled sleeping figures and took the hell outta dodge as the lovely housewife tried to wake up a tardy daughter.

"Well, it'd be nice if you would be as disciplined as these strays once you're finally at the academy." she continued, picking up a small pink basket by the right of the sliding paper door.

With impeccable timing, a male voice could be heard not too far behind her -

"Murakumo, give Amane some slack. She's still a civilian up until yesterday dear."

"You... urgh, I bet she inherited this tardiness from you! Geez..." She quips back with a turn and a point at the rather gruff salaryman chowing down on a small 2 foot high table just outside the room.

He didn't seem to mind the accusations and simply laughed, "Ahahaha! Does it matter dear? As long as we have each other along with our daughter and our small 2 bedroom, 1 living/dining/kitchen, 1 bathroom house we'd be fine!"

"You! Urgh... nevermind."

Her face turned beet red. If it was possible, she would've boiled like a kettle. However, this was, after all... the man she loved. Unlike the other girls who married their previous commanding officers, she was one of them who set out after the war had ended, found her self a life away from the oceans and settled down.



"And that's what happened before I went to the academy."

Back in present time, a girl with butt-length, white hair wearing a black, long-sleeved, one-piece sailor uniform adorned by white stripes at the edges narrates her story to the other girl in her unit. All of this while she clipped up the pair of red and white, striped, thigh-high socks she was sporting onto a garterbelt.

After that minor grooming task, she vividly describes what had transpired. She even went as far as to act out the gestures of her mother, from the floor stomping to the finger pointing. If she could blush on demand, she would've done so. That's how dedicated she was.

"It's stupid, stupid I say! I wish my mother married an admiral like yours did and not some washed up pathetic guy like my father."

Her partner, a rather playful lass with airy, back-length, brown hair seemed to be wildly fascinated with what she heard. She clapped her hands together from delight and suggested something outrageous. "Ufufu♪ That sounds wonderful~ I'm looking forward to switching parents with you on our next day-off! Say, is that acceptable for you, Amane...?"

"Hey, we're not allowed to call each other by our names while on a mission. Hime you ought to..." Quick to notice that she too had called the other girl by her actual name, Amane was quick to cover her mouth with that white-gloved right hand of hers.

Hime, simply clutched her stomach and belched out laughter. "Ohh... wonderful~ I love it... Of all the things, you didn't even care about my suggestion to swap parents~"

"Stop it! We don't know if our lazy bum of a commander bugged our equipment so he might be listening in on us right now!"

"Ufufu♪ Oh my, could it be?" She daintily pulls out a handkerchief from the pockets of her frilled skirt and wiped the tears welling up on her eyes.

"Could it be what!?" Amane was agitated and her arms violently shook. In much the same way as her mother nearly boiled from her story, she was quick to defend herself. "I-It's not like I'm worried about what he thinks!"

There was a subdued smile on Hime's face as she twirled a miniature spotlight keyring. "And so she says~ How troubling."

"...Hmmm. Think what you want... Not that I mind."

With a rather demure look on her face, she turned away. However, the playful giggling turned to something else as the equipment strapped or dangling on their being cackled to life.

"You two..." A drowned out voice passed through and caught both their attention. "You're broadcasting the U.P.W's signal, call for help please."

The two of them turned to each other and gasped in unison.

"A rogue naval base!"

"A rogue naval base~"

Amane casts her gaze towards the horizon. Across the vast, blue waters bathed by glorious sunlight, she spots small objects whizzing about the air. These objects swarmed a specific location like flies drawn to shit. A wince formed on Amane's face and she expressed her annoyance by cursing under her breath.

"A bad kind of wind is blowing..."



In an abrupt manner, the communication got cut-off. Static flooded the channels for seven seconds until it cleared up and a relaxed male voice greeted the pair.

"Greetings ladies. I'd have to ask you to ignore that S.O.S..."

Crack! The sound of crushing interrupted the man on the other line. "She crushed the communicator didn't she?"

"She crushed the communicator~" Hime giggled, holding up her communicator so Amane can continue to listen in on the conversation.

The man continued. "Destruction of property aside. I'd need the two of you to focus on delivering the payload. Command would likely send another group to help out, we can't have them knowing you're the dispersion unit."

Meanwhile, Amane rips out the bridge from the ship-shaped equipment on her right hip with the help of her trusty animated gun turret.

"Oh my, how troublesome. Are you implying that the ones currently performing the ambush are our targets~ How'd you find out?"

Hime rested her ear over the communicator's speakers as she playfully interrogated their commander.

"I didn't. Too much of a hassle, I merely guessed based on your location."

The reply was brief, not much enthusiasm to it either. His tone implied he'd just want their original job to be done as silently as possible. Something Hime wasn't in favor of.

"Ufufu♪ You heard the man. Arashio, launching gorgeously." Hime, with 10cm high angle mounts on both hands and blatantly disobeying orders, headed southeast to help the distressed.

Amane, who had just chucked out a good part of her rigging, pats her Rensouhou-kun on the head and also followed suit. "Amatsukaze from the rogue naval base dispersion unit. Set sail!"



Machine-gun fire heralded the approach of the pair who were rushing through the waters. Guns akimbo, Arashio - real name Hime, peppered the plethora of tiny planes, who were dropping miniature bombs on a convoy of abyssal transport ships, with lead.

"Naughty kids need spanking~ Ufufu♪"

What a sight for sore eyes they were! Now the abyssals, hideous amalgamation of steel and flesh they were in our eyes, hurriedly scooted over behind Arashio. Amatsukaze - real name Amane, weaved between the evacuating oppressed to face the five-piece mutsuki-class destroyers firing their fully decked out 12.7cm twin gun mounts at them.

Gently decelerating while Rensouhou-kun's turret head remained fixed on the lead Mutsuki, Amatsukaze pulled out a badge with a subtle attempt at stunning them from the glare reflecting off the shiny gold bits.

"U.P.W. Stop all rogue naval base operations immediately!"

Boom! That lil' Mutsuki in front of her just fired a shot aimed at the badge she was holding. All of them had their brows furrowed, definitely pissed. Amatsukaze wasn't one to back down either, the shot she might've evaded but the disrespect was reciprocated.

"No-now you've done it...!" Amatsukaze reaches in to a small metal box locked behind where the bridge of her rigging was supposed to be, if she had not pulled it out earlier.

"Oh my, how troublesome. Is that the payload you're reaching for?"

Arashio butts in as she goes front-center laying down suppression fire, scattering the Mutsukis before they can target Amatsukaze with a barrage of shells.

Rummaging through the locks, Amatsukaze finally lets loose whatever foul weapon she had been keeping stashed away. "Take this second gens!"

In a blur, she flings an animal of the feline variety at the mutsukis. At which point, Arashio halts fire to not accidentally injure the mesmerized fleet girls. With a "mraaaoooowwwww", the animal hurtles through the air for a few seconds before turning upright. Like a choir in a church, the mutsukis all gasped and commented.

"Oh no! It's a... It's a... CAT BOMB!"

That was the last they could recall as they all blanked out and rabidly tried to catch the bundle of joy.



In a short while, the mutsukis along with the carrier they'd been escorting came rushing back to their base. Amane and Hime tailed them after saying goodbye to the distressed transport abyssals. The amazing power of the CAT BOMB was undeniable, it completely devastates bases filled with second generation fleet girls.

As they docked into an unfamiliar port, Hime comments as she doffs her rigging. "Ufufu♪ I love it..."

"Hime, what's this about now?" Amane retorts, as her partner points at their previously fierce opponents. They were all degraded into generic fan girls swooning at a cat. Every single one who came into direct line of sight fell victim to the CAT BOMB and they joined the ever-growing crowd headed to replace their commanding officer with an animal.

In as casual a tone as she can muster, Hime adds. "Not being a second generation fleet girl~"

Stopping for a while, Amane switches into a pondering pose and replied while scratching her chin with the gloved hand. "...Hmmm. Not bad I suppose. I wouldn't like it if I could be forced to like... someone else."

"Especially not a cat~"

The soft click of a communicator stealthily being activated by Hime was completely undetected by Amane due to the former's giggling.

"Especially not a cat!"